e-Audio, 09:52:40
Narrated by: Ferdelle Capistrano & Graham Halstead
Release Date: December 5, 2023
Published by: Harlequin Audio
Read from: November 30- December 10, 2023
Stand-alone
Source: Audible
TW: Child Abuse, Parent with substance abuse problems, Mention of OD, Car Accident, Loss of a Parent, Grief,
For Readers Interested In: Realistic Fiction, Romance, Disability (Wheelchair User), Own Voices, Mental health, Dual POV, Coming of Age, YA, Non-linear timelinePerfect for fans of Jennifer Niven, Abigail Johnson draws a searing and lyrical portrait of grief, forgiveness, and the kind of love that blooms in the aftermath.
Eight years ago, Ethan and Rebecca met, two trouble-making kids sharing secrets and first kisses in a treehouse, until Ethan’s mom returned to take him away. Each and every visit, his only goodbye was a flower on Rebecca’s windowsill.
Three years ago, Ethan left for the last time to take care of his mother, who’s struggled with addiction his whole life.
Two years ago, Rebecca was in a car accident that killed her father. She’s been learning to navigate life as a wheelchair user ever since.
Now, they discover if their hardships have torn them apart…or will bring them closer than ever.
*MY THOUGHTS*
This is a really weird book for me to read. If you know me, you know why. I am not one who likes to read about anyone that has substance abuse problems because of some bad history with my family. It always hits too close to home. And I really don’t know what made me finish this one, but I couldn’t stop listening.
They met and became best friends. And then they were ripped away from each other. And then it happened over and over again. And though it hurt them, they continued to be around each other and be friend each other over and over again. But this last time, they’re almost adults, and things are so much more different than they were the last time they were together. So much has changed, but so much has also stayed the same. Will these things make or break their friendship?
So the part that I know way too much about in this book was Ethan’s. Not so much the coming and going every time, but the adult figure in a kid’s life who is suffering from substance abuse. I really should read the synopsis of books before I decide to add them to my TBR. But this one stood out to me and once I started it I couldn’t stop. The way he made decisions based on her, the way he was filled with so much anger all the time, the way he had so many tips and tricks for when she was doing all these things. It broke me. But it broke me because it all felt so real. No the person who had problems wasn’t my mom, but all of this still resonated with me. I know a fraction of what he was feeling, which is probably why I didn’t want to look away. He felt so real and I hated that I knew a piece of his pain.
As for Rebecca, I didn’t feel anything as visceral towards her as I did for Ethan. But that was only because I’m not a wheelchair user. Her wheelchair was from an accident, one that made her also lose her father. She’s left with a non-affectionate mom who she thinks blames her for her father’s death as well as doesn’t like her. I was broken about that for her. If nothing else, Johnson can really write an emotional character.
The only thing I didn’t like was the non-linear timeline. It kept jumping back and forth and it ended up making things seem really out of order. And I hate the way things were revealed that way. Normally I would like books like this, but when it’s dropped into the middle of the story and the main characters and what happened to them are the only things that are emotional, it’s not as good. And let me tell you, this book should have been a tear-jerker, but it just wasn’t. What they went through was emotional, but the way it was written just didn’t take it there. I think this is the reason the content didn’t hit me as bad. (Well that and because his mom didn’t pass away.) One thing I wish was looked more into and more explained tho was her mom. Why was she that way? Was she autistic? Did she just not want to be touched? I really wanted more than just “I wasn’t good at that stuff.” As a mom I was furious with her. Even if you did do all of those things for the reason you told her, you should have been way more transparent. I couldn’t imagine that her mom didn’t think for one second that she might not have taken raised tables the right way as a teenager. I swear parents in YA books get worse and worse.
The romance was ok. I was afraid that they would be falling for each other because they were going through things, but they were actually friends first and then started falling in love. The things that happened to them happened after they’d already been friends for years. But they never actually got together and everything, so I categorized this as more of a coming of age book that had strong romantic themes. Watching them grow and need each and then push each other away was just what I needed at that moment.
I wish there was so much more umph in this book. But then again I don’t know that I would have been ok enough to finish it. Again, I don’t have a disability, but I thought this was ok. She was independent and she had so much confidence. And he let her make her own mistakes and choices and I loved that. I was surprised to have liked this as much as I did.
Overall, I give this
