This bookish feature is an original by me! I had the epiphany for this the other day when I was writing out my 15 bookish confessions. (See #7) A lot of times I like to go “beyond the book” and do something that will connect me with the book and characters a little more. It will pop up on Mondays! Be on the look out for which books caught my eye and made me go beyond just reading it!
“Are you sure? Because you can tell me if I am. I have a tendency to over think things., especially when it comes to my friends, and I don’t know… I take things too personally, I mean, it isn’t always them. Sometimes it’s me. I just don’t know when it’s them and when it’s me, you know?”
pg 77
pg 77
It took me a long while to write this post seeing as this is one of the most personal things I’ve ever posted here on my blog. But after reading this book, I wanted all my followers to know how much I trust y’all, so I wanted y’all to get to know this part of me.
Just recently I was diagnosed with Anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), and just like Sam, I am also Purely Obsessive. For a while I was embarrassed about the situation, and didn’t want to take any meds or to just acknowledge the fact that I was really OCD. But as I sat and talked with my doctor, she explained to me that things could be so much worse. She told me that the things I obsess over (reading and blogging) are good things and that’s where I should keep my focus. I started realizing that my addiction could be so much worse.
As for my anxiety, I have general and separation anxiety and it has been getting worse and worse lately. I had started grinding my teeth and breaking them, and causing migraines that would last for three days. The boyfriend helped with the anxiety. He asked why I don’t go to many book conferences even though he knew there were some authors I knew I really wanted to meet. I remember crying to him telling him I didn’t like the crowds. He was the one who decided it would be a good idea for me to go with my mom (as a 26 year old) who whole heartedly thought it was a good idea. Now the hardest part about book signings and conferences is actually putting me and my mom on the same schedule. And for that I have the boyfriend to thank for giving me the idea.
The biggest thing I got from reading about Sam is to be thankful for those things that you can throw yourself into and make even the bad things into good ones. Sam made me feel stronger and I now I can share my story with others. This story was a bit hard to read, but it was only because there was so much I could relate to in Sam. I hated seeing someone else go through what I went through.
The thing that made me want to write this post was meeting Tamra Ireland Stone at RT2015. I did everything in my power to win an ARC of this, unfortunately, someone had already won it. We ended up having a long talk and discussed my OCD. Stone was the one who convinced me (and didn’t even know she was doing so) to write this post. Thank you YA community for listening to me. This is the way YA has helped save me.